A Writer's Life....Caroline Clemmons: THE FORTUNA, TEXAS NOVELS

Don't forget the Rafflecopter giveaway at the end of the post!

The Double D Ranch

A Fortuna, Texas Novel Book 1

by
Rochelle Bradley

Genre: Romantic Comedy

Longhorns and lingerie...

Much to the chagrin of foreman Josiah, Jessie Davidson wants a romance reduction. But the Double D Ranch hides a secret. Since inheriting the property, Jessie kept her grandmother’s hoard concealed, but now she’s found the courage to purge the unwanted items: steamy novels, thousands of them. Romance has to go! Donating the books is a good thing, right? Not when coupled with a dare.

The dare spirals out of control. The ante is upped when caches of the spicy books, left in barber shops, pool halls, and pubs, challenge others to join the fad. A perverted prankster runs amok playing on the town’s fantasies. Book clubs are formed. Plots acted out. In a town saturated with romance, Jessie finds her love life underdeveloped.

Keep Jessie safe. It’s the promise Josiah Barnes made to Jessie’s dying grandmother. He aims to honor it, even if it means protecting Jessie from himself. Failing her in the past has him on high alert when the Double D becomes ground zero for the arousal avalanche sweeping the town. As a full-support, silent partner, Josiah will do anything to augment the Double D. But when Jessie starts selling handmade lingerie, keeping his hands to himself is easier said than done…

Will she shelve happily ever after like a rejected novel, or open her heart and start a new chapter?

Goodreads * Amazon

“You ready?” Jessie hesitated, embarrassed about the collection Grandma left. She led B.J. up the hardwood stairs to the second floor. The scent of his musky cologne preceded him.

B.J. smirked. “Born that way.”

“I doubt it.” Her hand gripped the metal doorknob. When she’d inherited the Double D Ranch from her grandparents, the cache in the upstairs bedroom came as a complete shock. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, steeling herself for his reaction. The area behind the door once housed Grandma’s sewing room but now…

The mess was as awe-inspiring as it was overwhelming, which had been why she enlisted the help of the reluctantly altruistic B.J.

“Well?” he grunted, crossing his arms as he waited. A hard worker, the thirty-two-year-old man had caught her eye a year ago with a smile that lit his face. The smile disappeared, however, when his wife left him for another man. Now the handsome man scowled as a hobby.

Her hesitant fingers tightened around the smooth knob, slowly her wrist shifted, and the latch popped. The door opened a crack. “You ready?” she repeated, taking another deep breath.

He shifted his feet with impatience. “Already said I was.”

Words could do little to describe the mess or the enormity of it. It wasn’t the worst thing she’d ever encountered but Jessie found it embarrassing, nonetheless.

She could’ve had a cleaning party with her best friends, Kelly and Mona, but they’d heckle her to hell and back with what they’d find, plus the whole town would find out in no time. She didn’t want her grandma’s neurotic obsession, the Davidson version of the skeleton in the closet, to become known.

Then there was Josiah. He’d keep the secret. But being confined with the cowboy made it hard for Jessie to breathe. Her father trusted B.J. and laboring beside a stranger would be easier than dealing with the funny feelings bumping elbows with Josiah caused.

No, B.J. was her only option.

She swallowed then pushed the door open. The hinges creaked, filling the silence.

B.J. blinked twice. “What the hell?”

Books--thousands and thousands of paperback books, all romance novels--were stacked in neat rows from floor to ceiling. The bedroom was full save for a three by three space on the floor. It was a dark closet with book wallpaper. To say her grandmother had loved to read was an understatement.

B.J. pushed on the stacks a few times but nothing moved, it was solid. He whistled low.

The confounded man stood with hands on hips staring at the twelve-foot ceiling line. “How am I going to reach the top?”

“I planned ahead, knowing you weren’t ten feet high.” Jessie retrieved a four-foot step stool from behind the door. She unfolded it and he climbed up. In the hallway, a stack of plastic storage totes waited to be filled. She retrieved one and placed it next to the base of the ladder.

Many of the books had worn spines and dog-eared pages. Memories of Grandma flitted to mind. When Jessie was in elementary school she’d climbed into her grandma’s warm lap and asked, “Why do you read them?”

Grandma’s eyes had crinkled as she smiled. “Love, child. They are filled with love. Everyone wants to live happily ever after. Someday, Jessie, you’ll find it too.” She’d tweaked Jessie’s nose then tickled her.

“Hey, Jessie,” B.J. spoke, startling her. He glanced down from the ladder. “You’re gonna need more tubs. What the hell kind of books are these, anyway?” He stared at the cover of a scantily clad woman leaning against a bare chested man in leather pants. “Werewolves in Heat?”

“Grandma had a thing for romance novels.” Jessie shrugged, feeling her face heat.

“Honey, it was more than a thing. She hoarded the damn books.”

B.J. was right. One stack near the wall held one hundred and forty books. Some stacks had thinner books, equaling more

Jessie was grateful for the longhorn cattle ranch her grandparents left her, even if it hid her grandmother’s secret. Her grandparents each died within a year and her breath hitched thinking about them. Josiah had worked for her grandpa Don but stayed on as foreman when she inherited.

As if on cue, Josiah’s sun-kissed face peeked around the corner. The dusty tip of his boot and a stray piece of hay sent her mind reeling to the night he’d found her crying in the hayloft. The memory of his lips on her neck sent a shiver down her spine.

He pointed to B.J. who reached for more books, and mouthed, “You okay?”

Her heart tripped when she gazed into his curious eyes framed with a brow etched with concern. She gave a thumbs up then waved him off, slightly annoyed yet comforted he was checking on her.

MY BIGGEST FAN

I participate every November in NaNoWriMo or National Novel Writing Month. The goal of NaNoWriMo is to write fifty-thousand words in thirty days. Since 2008, I’ve joined writers around the world each November.

One such November, I wrote fifty-two thousand words in a manuscript, but it wasn’t finished. I wanted to give a copy to my grandma Elaine for Christmas.

At ninety-five she was still an avid reader. She read memoirs, thrillers, romance, and anything anyone would give her. She made it clear for Christmas, she didn’t want the family to buy her any gifts, but I wanted to finished the novel and print it for her.

I worked through December struggling to get it done. I persevered and by December twenty-second, I concluded the work with a simple yet somewhat cheesy line: With Walden Beckenbauer still at large, life held uncertainties, but one thing was for certain, as Lauren clung to her new husband, she knew that no one could clone their love.

I printed the one hundred and forty or so pages and gave them to my grandmother unedited. Grandma teared up when I handed her the manuscript.

Later that day, she told me that reading about sex doesn't do a thing for her at her age. I wouldn't want to know otherwise. She wore an Angry Birds hat, whom she said was her date, while telling me this.

If I had cut out the sex from the manuscript there’d be only two thousand words. Just kidding, there was no sex in the story but a canoe-load (it's a summer camp novel) of kissing. I hoped that was okay at ninety-five-years-old.

My grandma has since passed, but I hold her memory close. She always encouraged me to write. The conversation on that Christmas Day still makes me smile. Unfortunately, the novel I gave my grandma that holiday has yet to be published. However, I dedicated my first published book to my grandma Elaine and all grandmothers: The Double D Ranch.

Plumb Twisted

A Fortuna, Texas Novel Book 2

Karaoke and Kidnapping...

Piper McCracken needs a fresh start. Her father’s death, a failed engagement, and her ex-fiancé-turned-stalker prompt her to make a bold leap . . . from the Windy City to Fortuna, Texas. Piper feels ready to take on small town life—that is, until she’s erroneously proclaimed a shy cowboy’s mail-order bride.

Hired as a personal assistant to Jessie Barnes, Piper becomes much more: friend, beta tester, and . . . intimate apparel model? With a three-legged cat, fake news, drunken karaoke, romance novel obsessed men, a cocky old lady, and a perverted town prankster, Piper finds Fortuna plumb twisted.

All Cole Dart really needs is his family and job working at the Big Deal ranch. After surviving cancer, his life is like a pair of broken-in boots. Comfortable. He doesn’t want the complication of a relationship now. Or ever. But when Piper’s stalker catches up to her, Cole’s protective instincts kick into high gear and he’s determined to step between her and danger, no matter the cost.

When a tornado rips through town, Cole’s home is strewn across the county, can Piper help him pick up the pieces and find happily ever after or will the stalker tear them apart forever?

Goodreads * Amazon

More Than a Fantasy

A Fortuna, Texas Novel Book 3

Book 3 in the Fortuna, Texas series.

One night changed everything...

Finally content single, second grade teacher Kelly Greene doesn’t need a man screwing up her life, even a sexy cop like Ben. All she needs is her rechargeable double A batteries.

Operation: Win Kelly. For Officer Ben Moore repairing a creepy Victorian house, a workplace dalliance, and camping au naturel are beyond his comfort zone. Ben schemes to bring Kelly’s fantasies alive, but in Fortuna, Texas, where men read romance and cosplay is second nature, it’s hard to keep their rendezvous hidden from gossipmongers and, more importantly, her match-making momma.

When danger threatens Fortuna Elementary, Ben is assigned a case that keeps thrusting them together, Kelly has a helluva time ignoring her heart—let alone her girly bits.

Ben holds the key to the handcuffs but Kelly must decide if he also holds the key to her heart.

Goodreads * Amazon

Municipal Liaisons

A Fortuna, Texas Novel Book 4

Book 4 in the romantic comedy Fortuna, Texas series.

She aspired to renew the town; he desired to revive her love life…

Who’d have thought Michaela Arschfick would like Texas? Particularly some Podunk town with the mighty Fire Ant as its mascot. But from first glance, Fortuna captivates Michaela.

With most of the residents, primarily men, keeping their noses glued to the pages of romance novels, they don’t notice Fortuna needs a makeover. Michaela takes on the challenge of opening the eyes of City Hall to Fortuna’s potential. The longer she stays in the cozy town the more it feels like home, especially with the sexy, young mayor giving her VIP treatment.

After his wife died in a flash flood, the mayor of Fortuna, Texas, Jasen Delay, delved into work. Two years later, he’s still wearing the placating smile, but when a vanload of unban consultants visit the town... a beauty catches his eye.

Determined to keep their relationship professional, Jasen and Michaela must stymie their blossoming feelings and focus on revitalizing Fortuna's downtown. A nosy newspaper reporter, a perverted prankster, and sightings of Jasen's wife's ghost have Michaela second guessing her choice to stay. Jasen will do anything to keep Michaela in town. Fortuna needs her but, more importantly, Jasen needs her.

With Jasen's help, can Michaela wade through small town bureaucracy, solve the mystery of the canyon ghost, and learn to trust to her heart?

Goodreads * Amazon

Book Trailer

https://youtu.be/Tbvv0H9bGUA

FUN WITH THE GIRLS

I put off having a mammogram as long as I could.

My experience: it was like going to a spa with a plush warm robe and relaxing music until the unnaturally squashing of things that prefer gentle caresses, and the awkward way you contort your face, and how stomach presses against a cold machine, or the handle naturally held with a death grip then there is the stranger manipulating your boob so it can say “cheese.”

Besides all that, it was cake.

The waiting area was busier than expected. There were kids, a man, and an old lady waiting for some unfortunate soul. What's up with bringing kids along? How do you explain that one: "Don't worry, Johnny, Mommy is just having her fun bags squished and photographed by the doctor."

The receptionist called my name and I went to fill out the paper work. Not a clip board fill-in-the-blank paper to work on in the waiting room, but I got my own latrine-sized room with a door for privacy. Fancy. Not quite sure why the privacy, seeing that everyone unfortunate enough to venture to the second floor suite was there to get their boobies manhandled.

If I’d been born a cat I'd be dead by now. My curiosity would’ve gotten the better of me. Have you ever wanted to see what the doctors see? As soon as boob number one had the picture snapped in its acting debut, I asked, "Can I see?" The technician graciously acquiesced.

What a strange experience to see inside the body. The semi-circle in shades of gray reminded me of a solar flare. The next step was to switch sides and boobs. "Don't be shy, girl. It's your turn to shine. Blind us with your solar flare brightness!"

The office has a separate exit that doesn't lead through the waiting room. Are they afraid someone is going to run through and scare potential victims, I mean, clients? "That machine froze my nipple off! I can't feel my mammaries!"

If I’d had the opportunity, I would have skipped through because I was as happy as a hippie at bra burning: "I'm free!"

All awkwardness aside, it was a quick visit. The staff was pleasant. Hey, they get to work with a bunch boobs all day. I was in and out in less than a half hour. In fact, when I exited to the hallway I stood the a moment and thought "What the hell? Did that just happen?" Totally surreal.

Go get your boobs squished. It’s fast, easy, and could save your life!

Rochelle Bradley puts an artistic spin on everything she does but there are two things she fails at miserably:

1. Cooking (seriously, she can burn water)

2. Sewing (buttons immediately fall back off)

She loves baking and makes a mean BTS (Better than Sex) cake. When in observation mode she is quiet, however, her mouth is usually open with an encouraging glass-is-half-full pun or, quite possibly, her foot.

She is a Bearcat, a Buckeye, an interior decorator, and fluent in sarcasm.

In 2008, when her youngest entered Kindergarten, she decided to get the stories out of her head. Midway through her first novel, hurricane Ike (yes, a hurricane in Ohio) rendered the laptop useless with a nine-day power outage. She didn't give up, but continued to pursue her dream.

Every November Rochelle takes on the challenge of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo.org) where she endeavors to write 50,000 words in thirty days. You can often hear her cheering the Dayton area Wrimos (those who join her in this crazy pursuit).

Rochelle shares her home with a big black cat, an itty-bitty orange tiger kitty, her daughter, her son, and her Prince.

She loves to connect with readers. You can find her on Facebook (search for Author Rochelle Bradley), Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram.

Visit Rochelle's website to sign up for her newsletter to keep up to date about future novels and book signings (RochelleBradley.com).